Destroy it. Destroy it all.

Tamera knew she had found what she was looking for just based on the tiny details she had. Now that she knew the truth there was no going back. She looked over at Kamal through the back door with tears in her eyes. How was she going to tell him? How was she going to tell him the news that would likely uproot his life. Their life. What was supposed to be there happily ever after…

She hit the X on her private browser. Cleared her computer history just in case, gently closed her MacBook shut & hid the envelop she just received in her purse. She would deal with this another time. Right now she would put on her best performance. Channel her inner Angels Bassett & keep going as if she knew nothing.

“Babe!” Kamal yelled from the back yard. Jogging inside to see where I was he instantly stopped at my office door, sensing something was wrong. He was attentive like that, knowing when things were off with me. I loved that about him.

“You good, T?”

“Yes, baby” I replied still sitting behind my desk staring past him. I couldn’t bare to look him in the eyes. “Just swamped with these reviews at work. You know how it is”

He moved in closer grabbed my hand, lifted me from my chair & gave me the most gentle hug. I melted whenever I was in his arms. This. This right here is why I can’t tell him or my family what I know. I don’t want this feeling to ever fade.

“Get dressed. We are going to be late for your dinner. You’re almost 35 old lady” Kamal joked being only 9 months younger.

“I can’t wait to celebrate you, you deserve tonight babe. Head upstairs when you’re ready. I’ve already laid out what you need.” He said heading towards our loft bedroom.

As I watched him move so smoothly up the stairs, I hear my phone vibrating. I turn around & shuffle some things on my desk until I find it. A smile spreads across my face when I see Londyns name across the screen.

“Best friend!” Londyn exclaims. “Are you getting ready?!? Please tell me you’re not still working. Let me call Kamal to get your ass up.. You’re going to be late aren’t y-?”

I cut her off before she can finish her sentence. “Damn girl breathe. You didn’t even greet me! I’m doing well Lon thank you for asking!”

She sighs. “My bad girl. I just don’t want to lose these reservations because you know you’re never on time. You know how hard it is to accommodate a party this size at a place like Luxe in 9th? I gotta keep you sharp!”

“I know. I appreciate you bestie”

“Oh naw. What’s wrong? I hear it all in your voice”

“I’ll tell you when I see you.” Is all I say.

As I get to the top of the stairs, we end the call. Kamal, in all his glory is getting out of the shower. Towel around his waist chest glistening. I say a silent prayer. Hoping that what I just found out doesn’t ruin what I have with this beautiful chocolate man.

As we dress, all I can think about is that envelop. I can’t keep this to myself. I’m about to explode. As soon as I can get Londyn alone I have to tell her.

We arrive at Luxe in 9th, valet & we walk into an empty restaurant.

“Mal, are you sure y’all made the reservation for tonight? We are on time & nobody is even here.”

I turn to look around. As I’m turning back to face Kamal. I see him drop to one knee. God, please tell me this isn’t happening right now. Today? After I just found out something that could end us? Lord, PLEASE!

I begin to panic as I see Kamal pull out a black ring box from his pant pocket. Just as he begins to speak I see our family, friends & a photographer appear behind him. This man is really about to propose to me. I cannot say no.

He begins to speak slow & calculated as he usually does when he’s nervous. “Damn he looks good” I think.

“T, you’ve brought a joy into my life I never thought I was capable of feeling. Not knowing my biological family really did a number on me growing up & experiencing unconditional love was something I never thought I’d find for myself. Even through all my flaws. My inadequacies & my shortcomings you still saw me & I’m forever grateful. I am so ready to spend the rest of my life showing you that my love has no bounds. Tamera McKenzie Shaw, will you marry me?”

With tears I my eyes I accepted the 3 karat rose gold & black princess cut diamond ring he presented me with. “Yes!!!! Yes, I’ll marry you!” I exclaim. It was in that moment that I knew I would be taking this new found secret to the grave.

I pull Kamal off of his knee & kiss him with all the passion I have in my body. Our lips separate & he says, “Happy 35th birthday Tamera. I love you so much.”

After what felt like a million photos & congratulations, we finally sit down to eat. While we are waiting on the food I grab Londyn out of her seat & pull her to the restroom with me.

“Girl I’m so glad this is over. Keeping this secret was the worst. You know we tell each other everything. I’m happy as hell though. Tonight has been so perfect for you! Congratulations baby girl” she says as she reaches in for a hug. When I don’t hug her back immediately she grabs my shoulders & makes me face her.

“Tam, what’s wrong. You’re not happy? I thought you love Mal?”

Instantly I begin to cry & start to explain to her the news I received just hours earlier. I hand her the letter that came in the mail that outlined everything. The look on her face said it all.

In true Londyn fashion the dramatics begin. “IKYFL. This cannot be happening right now? What are the damn odds T? Wow. Shit. Sis! I have no words.”

“ My sentiments EXACTLY. My sentiments exactly.” I repeat.

With the most serious face I’ve ever seen her display she asks the question that I didn’t really want to face but I knew it was coming. “What now?”

“I’m not going to tell him. Or anybody else for that matter. This goes to our grave. Which means that you have to be my friend for life or I gotta kill you” I joke. Trying to make light of the shit show that was now my life.

“This is deep” she whispers, “but you know damn well your secret is safe with me & I’m not going anywhere” she proclaims.

Who knew that an 8X10 piece of paper would change my life for ever? Or would it? It was decided then that I wouldn’t tell another soul. That this information would die with me. With us.

YOU ARE A 39% SIBLING MATCH WITH KAMAL H. ROGERS

Was what the first line on the letter read. Kamal was my half brother & we were in love. After my dad died I never thought I would get the answers. I never thought that I would find my brother who was taken away from the family by his mother at birth but here we were engaged. Happy. Building a life together. I cannot ruin my Happily Ever After.

“Earth to Tamera!” Londyn called out. “Where did you go girl? Bring those thoughts back to earth! What are you going to do with the documents the company sent you?” She asked.

I knew I’d never find a love like this again. I knew that neither of us would recover from this devastating blow. So with the most confidence I could muster, I looked my best friend in the eyes & said…

“Destroy it. Destroy it all.”